I have two confessions to make. I was never the kind of person who goes goo goo gaa gaa over an infant. I mean, I always thought that they are cute as long as they are someone else’s. And these days, there are more little ‘monsters’ than little ‘cutsies’. My mom said that children under 3 are angels. Children above 3 are devils.
And confession number 2 is that I am a very impatient person. I have a quick and bad temper. And I also cannot handle stress and changes very well. Richard can testify that. I never thought I could be a mother, let alone a good mother. To tell you the truth, there are so many times I almost wanted to smolder Dominic, or throw him out with the bath water. I broke down countless times during the initial days because it was just too tough to cope.
Being a mom is so tough! And when people ask me how I coped (the single friends who have no idea what it is like yet), the only thing I can say is that it’s all God’s Grace. God gave me this beautiful son and He won’t leave me to my own devises to deal with something so ‘foreign’ to me. When I went bonkers, I asked the Lord to give me strength and grace and He always does.
Looking back, I know it is not myself. I know who I am, the type of person I was, and I can only say that the whole thing cannot be from me. It must be God. Only He can take nothing and make something out of it. Only He can make a person like me into a mother! And He is our ‘ever present help in times of need’. To Him be all the glory.
To those friends who have fear of motherhood because of their ‘perceived’ inadequacy, this is my testimony. If God can turn me into a mom, He can do the same for you.
How to survive with God’s wisdom? I really cannot imagine. Especially when it comes to babies, they can’t tell you what they want, or what is bothering them. They only know how to cry. Then when you try to look for information, you get conflicting information or information that burdens you rather than help you.
What to do? Only way is to ask God for wisdom. He knows everything and He is all powerful. Who else to go to except Him?
There is no ‘right’ theory to parenting and what works for one kid may not work for another. Again, God knows the baby best, so it’s best to ask Him. Sometimes, He teaches me to do things that are contrary to ‘popular beliefs’. But hey! It works for us!
So ‘trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not to your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path’. (Proverbs 3:5,6)
Update : Now with 2 kids
Only one thing to say – I need God’s Grace and Wisdom even more!
Update : Now with 3 kids!!!
No way I can survive without God’s Grace and Wisdom!!!